Why I'm Donating My Birthday

Every week, 38 children pass away from cancer. Thirty eight kids. That's hard to fathom. Hard to imagine. Hard to comprehend. 

I was introduced to this unfathomable statistic 3 years ago while working with my client Children's Cancer Research Fund at my {now previous} job. CCRF supports the brightest doctors whose groundbreaking research is leading to better treatments and cures for childhood cancer. The company I worked for partnered with CCRF to provide video and event production services for their signature gala each year. I was lucky that through my work, I was able to be a tiny, tiny piece of that. 

Now, it's easy to rally around a cause when you're personally affected. I am not. It's easy to rally around a cause when a member of your family or your friends have been affected. Mine have not. For me, my rallying comes from knowing the people inside the walls of CCRF who have dedicated their lives to raising awareness, raising funds and to finding a cure for childhood cancer. These people, who I now consider dear friends, have changed my life. The stories I've heard, the patients I've seen, & the very people who work day in and day out to change this statistic have changed my life.

As I was thinking about my birthday this year and have been approached by family and friends with questions of what I wanted and what I wanted to do to celebrate, nothing came to mind. {Partially because for those of you who know me, you know if I want something, I go and get it. I don't wait for birthday's or holidays to come around - why wait!} My normal response to this would be "let's go to dinner" or "let's grab coffee" but this year, I want to do something different.

So, I'm donating my birthday. How does it work?? Simple. For my friends, family {or hopefully even strangers who come across this post}: please take whatever you would give to me for my birthday whether that be dinner, coffee, a gift and put those dollars towards funding research to find a cure for childhood cancer. I'm tearing up as I write this post and remembering some of the chilling words from patient and family stories we told for CCRF - together, we really can make a difference. We CAN find a cure. So skip my birthday coffee. Skip my birthday gift - and help me in whatever capacity you're able to, to fund & find a cure.

With my birthday on June 18th, I'm starting this TODAY and giving us all a chance {and a big window} to donate. My goal is at least $500 --- let's blow that out of the water.

It feels good to do good, so let's all do some together today. My friends at CCRF, the patients, their families and I, THANK YOU. 

XO, 

Molly 

Please donate directly on my FB post. The link is here

{Photos with my CCRF family from Dawn of a Dream, CCRF's signature gala, over the years below}

A Cozy Weekend at The Charmant Hotel

About a month ago, my husband and I took a little drive to spend our anniversary weekend at the impossibly charming The Charmant Hotel. Nestled on the river in La Crosse, Wisconsin, The Charmant is the perfect romantic weekend getaway. {For my Minneapolis readers, The Charmant is the sister hotel to our very own Hewing Hotel!}

The Charmant is a renovated candy factory built in 1898 - architectural details have been restored and refreshed. It holds the charm of 1898 with the subtle modernization of 2018. Upon checking in, you're welcomed with complimentary chocolates, of course! We visited this candy counter many, many times. 

Winter was the perfect time to visit The Charmant. While La Crosse boasts beautiful landscapes and outdoor activities, we opted to cozy up inside and enjoy the ultimate relaxation. I break down my favorite parts of the hotel below:

1. The Parlour // When you walk into the hotel, to your right is The Parlour. Offering coffee by day and spirits by night, this room is one you don't want to miss. We spent much of our time during the weekend sitting on the couch next to the wood-burning fireplace reading, playing games & enjoying each others company. 

2. The Restaurant // We dined in the restaurant Friday evening for dinner and Sunday morning for breakfast. Both meals were unbelievable! The restaurant serves rustic French cuisine with options that consist of cafe-inspired classics. We were not disappointed by either of the meals we had. 

3. The Rooms // Like any good millennial, I'm a sucker for a brick wall and quirky, minimalist decor. Each room at The Charmant is unique in it's own way - we stayed in a Classic Salle King. I booked our stay late and would have loved to stay in one of the suites, but it turned out, we didn't even need that. The room was spacious, comfortable & similar to the rest of the hotel....cozy. 

If you're looking for that perfect winter weekend getaway, The Charmant is it. My husband and I returned home to The Twin Cities feeling relaxed, refreshed & fulfilled from a low-key weekend with so much intentional time spent together. We talked, dreamed, laughed, were transported to another time in this beautiful hotel. A MUST DO in our book! 

XO, 

Molly 

Our First Year of Marriage // Lessons Learned

December 10, 2016 I married the sweetest soul my heart has ever known. It was a *perfect* winter day. A balmy 14 degrees with the most beautiful, light snow falling softly from the sky as we exited the church following our ceremony. The kind of light snow that doesn't ruin your hair when it lands on it (& as a bride wearing her hair down on her wedding day, this is very important.) There isn't much more you can ask for in a winter wedding...snow!

As I sit here writing this post, I'm thinking back on that day and those beautiful memories that will last a lifetime. The stolen, knowing glances with my groom. Our closest family and friends standing next to us, supporting us. Our dream day that came to life. Only 365 days into our marriage, I don't pretend to know everything - but here are some humbling, valuable lessons we've learned thus far.

1. Marriage isn't hard. (Stay with me on this one) You get asked this question a lot during your first year of marriage - "how are things going? is it hard?" I don't typically go into depth about this when people ask, so I'll share it here. Marriage isn't hard - life is hard. Work. Maintaining relationships and friendships. Upkeep on a home. Committing to your workouts. Making time for yourself to decompress. Finding moments for passion projects. Managing finances. Those things are hard. Those things take up space in your schedule and in your mind. These things can be stressors in our day-to-day life that can in turn, put stress on marriage. I think many people get these confused, thinking the challenge is with your partner and with your marriage, but if we stop to look at what the source of those stressors are, we can get some clarity as to what the real challenge is. 

2. It's not a competition. I'm competitive. My husband is competitive. He's very good at reminding me that we are not in competition with each other. Who took out the trash last time, cleaned the bathroom, cooked dinner, who did more around the house...that doesn't matter. If I'm being real, which I hope to always be on this platform, this is challenging for me. My husband hands down does more than me. Yet I'm somehow always finding ways to make it known when I feel I've done more. I'm still working on this. Thanks for your patience, C. 

3. Time spent together doesn't necessarily mean quality time. I'm kind of cheating on this one, because I realized this soon after we moved in together (about 4 months before our wedding) but it still holds true today. Things change when you move in together. You're used to driving to see each other, making more plans since you're not living in the same space. When you move in with each other, you're together...All.The.Time. However, sitting next to each other on the couch watching TV is not quality time. Me reading in the corner and my husband working in the other is not quality time. We learned quickly that we had to be more intentional about our time. Despite being together more, we had to make it a point to still have those times to connect, talk to each other, keep doing the things we loved to do before we lived in the same space and were so much more easily accessible to each other. 

4. It's okay to take space.  My husband and I both really need and value time spent alone. We both recharge from taking this space. It's not uncommon to have an evening in our house where he heads downstairs and I stay upstairs. For some people this may not be 'normal' but for us, it's necessary. I'm a firm believer in doing the things that fuel your soul, that help you be the best person you can, that help you feel whole. For us, that's time to ourselves. To reflect on our day. To read or write. Or to just simply BE. By honoring the space we both need for ourselves, we're able to be a better partner for each other. 

5. Maintaining other relationships. I often tell people that marriage is the best because you have a built-in best friend. There's nothing better than waking up and your person being right there. Ready to take on the day with you - coffee, a run, adventures in the city. It's so easy to fall into this routine where your time spent is only with each other. Relationships are important to both of us and this year we've really learned that prioritizing that time with friends, siblings, parents, outside of the time we spend just the two of us is crucial. Meaningful connection outside of the two of us is something we believe helps us maintain a strong foundation in our marriage.

A few more:

• Individual goal setting is just as important as joint goal setting.
• You have to choose each other, every day.
• Share and divide responsibilities.
• Some days you're not going to be a good spouse, and that's okay. 
• Calmer heads prevail (This is for me...I'm working on it. My Irish flares up too often).
• You're on the same team. 

{There's so much to share, I may have to do another post at a later date. Would you guys be interested in that?}

Marriage is by far the most substantial thing I've done in life to date, but as one of my older sisters has joked, there is definitely a learning curve. We've learned a lot in these 365 days. We've grown, we've cried, we've laughed and most importantly we've LOVED.

I can't wait to spend the rest of my life learning alongside you, Christopher. I love you. 

"There was nothing worth sharing like the love that let us share our name."

XO, 

Molly 

Gratitude

grat·i·tude

noun

1. the quality of being thankful; readiness to show appreciation for and to return kindness.

I can hardly believe that Thanksgiving is already here. I love this season - a season of thankfulness, gratitude, love. My husband pokes fun at me because I'm THAT person that makes our family go around the table and share what we're thankful for. Every. Single. Thanksgiving. If you're dining with our family, you better come ready to share your gratitude. The sharing time never goes without a few laughs, tears (usually from me) & undeniable joy. 

Gratitude is a staple practice for our family. Starting with my sweet Mom. Last year she gifted my sisters and I our very first 'Gratitude Journals' with specific instructions: each day, write down three things you're grateful for. No matter what kind of day you had, take the time, write down your gratitude. You will always feel better afterwards.

We all know, Mom is always right. But she really hit the nail on the head with this one. She consistently encourages and teaches us to practice gratitude all year, instead of just on Thanksgiving. With that in mind, I want to share some of the things that I've listed throughout the year. Looking back at my lists, some of these things seem so small, insignificant, funny even. That's the beauty in gratitude though. Who says what you can and can't be grateful for? 

I'm Grateful For:

- My sweet husband // We're coming up on 1 year of marriage and my goodness that is CRAZY! { I have a fun post coming up on our first year of marriage - stay tuned! }

- Family // My parents and sisters, who are all truly my best friends. Not everyone has the type of family dynamic as ours. This is a blessing!

- Girlfriends // My people. All who I've been linked to for most of my life and/or most of my adult life. I'm incredibly grateful I've found my people - you hold on tight to that. 

- Our new pup, Wrigley // He has taught me so many humbling lessons. He's still teaching me many more. 

- Coffee // However trivial this may be, it's real. 

- The cold // This is a weird one - but I really am thankful for the cold. It brings people together. It's intimate, it forces more quality time spent connecting over {Irish} coffees, meals, etc. Time spent with loved ones watching the snow fall, sitting by the fire. I love the cold for this reason.

- Sunrises // I found a quote earlier this year: 'sunsets taught me that sometimes beauty only lasts for a few moments - but sunrises showed me that all it takes is patience to experience it all over again.' Wow, did that every change my perspective. 

- My clients // I love working in the business of people. I'm incredibly humbled to work in a career that continuously introduces me to new people that I get to build relationships and even friendships with. How cool is that?

- Books // To constantly have an opportunity to get lost in another world or learn a new lesson... this is never something I take for granted. 

- Small acts of kindness // Snail mail. Flowers on a friends doorstep. Thinking of you texts. 

- Writing // It's freeing. Therapeutic. Humbling to share my voice. 

I obviously didn't share my year's worth of gratitude - but these are some highlights. I encourage everyone to start a gratitude journal. You'll be amazed at how easy it is to find even just ONE thing you're grateful for. Even on the worst days. I'm continuously working on my gratitude & look forward to a life spent practicing it. 

Have a very happy and blessed Thanksgiving. 

XO, 

Molly 

Nearly 365 days later...

You would be baffled if I told you the number of times I sat down to "create my blog" given that we are nearly at a year later and I am just now hitting PUBLISH. Blogging has always been one of those "that would be fun" ideas I've had. I love to write, I definitely need a creative outlet, I like having ownership of something that's wholeheartedly mine. So why not, right? It sounded like a good idea until I actually sat down to work on it. There was always something more important - cleaning the house, catching up with friends, finishing that book, color-coordinating my closet (yes, this is more important). But eventually, I ran out of excuses...and here we are. 

I'm incredibly grateful for my family and friends who have heard me talk about this infamous blog for the past year without seeing ANY progress or promise that I would actually follow through.

{Side note: this is how you know you have found your people in life. Their questions about my blog were always matched with: "Oh yeah! I'm getting there! Building the site and it's going really well! I'll have something SOON." Only to never have gained any ground. Yet, these people consistently supported the idea and cheered me on. Thank you, you know who you are.} <----- I sound like I'm accepting an Academy Award. 

Anyway, I figured a good first post would be to explain the idea behind this blog & its name. 'The Pretty Now' is a testament to myself. It's my personal pursuit of a pretty mind, heart, body & soul. It's consciously working every day to have kinder thoughts, kinder words, kinder actions, purposeful connections with friends and strangers alike. A commitment to strengthening my body, my mind & pursuing only the things that enrich my soul. 

I'll be using this space to share my NOW. What's in my heart. What's in the oven. What's in my shopping cart. My latest revelations during yoga (& believe me, there are A LOT of them). Lessons learned in marriage. It truly is a space for me. I always said I didn't care if my mom was the only one who read it, as long as I can write and create, I'll be happy. 

So: thanks, Mom, for reading. I love you. 

& if there's anyone else reading along - Hello & Thank you! I hope to connect with you in some way through a post now or in the future. 

XO, 

Molly 

{PS: Bear with me as I work out the kinks of managing a website, Tech is NOT my friend.}